In this series, I use decorative symbols as metaphors to explore memories and experiences. The subject of my work uses metaphors to discuss personal past and present experiences related to internal struggles. My memories are my inspiration for what to address in my art. The symbols themselves are shallow in meaning but they are there to further each narrative. The intentional placement of the canvases on the wall is to help the narratives as well. My work is primarily made of oil paint on stretched canvas coated with acrylic gesso. The lengths and widths of sizes of each canvas accompany the stories. The oil paint into paintings that are semi-sculptural use metal wire and glue as the base of the sculptures. The flatter paintings are just oil paint and some gamsol.

This subject is based around my exploration of self as memories and as I live it. Basing my works upon my struggles was a natural choice for a couple of reasons. First, I have had difficulties with verbal communication. I have loved using metaphors in my day to day speech, but because of the difference between speech patterns between other people and I, I eventually largely gave up on speaking in a way that is comfortable for me. But, I want to work against this feeling of isolation. Second, I want to open up about my experiences with mental health. I am interested in psychology/psychoanalysis/analyzing the self and searching for answers from myself, for myself, and perhaps some answers may be satisfactory for others, too. For me, the process of creation is a struggle as well, one of indecision/perfectionism (high anxiety) versus looseness (low anxiety). Even the result of my process is a narrative of the fear of not doing “good enough”; a struggle of expectations and anxiety. The canvas size and shapes are kept within dimensions that are easily relatable to a passing person. In other words, not too small to feel overly precious and not too big to feel overwhelming. I use oil paint primarily for its structure. Forming paint to create depth and give a sculptural quality brings the artwork from illustrating an illusion to something that looks like it actually exists.